who really has it worse

So I'm dirty at this point, right? And he just, he tosses me in that sink. So I'm there with like some cups and plates and shit. He washes me, he puts me in the drying rack, right? What? He puts, I was just saying, he puts me in the drying rack. Uh-uh, before that. He, shit, he washed me. Wow, that's, I didn't know he knew how to use a sponge. Dude, I- No, no, no, look, it doesn't matter to me. I get under that tap from time to time. I get my water, I just- You have a tap? Dude. Oh, God. No, it's news to me we got running water. I didn't mean to. No, no, no, listen, it's all, I mean, look, it's not like he doesn't regularly check if I'm dying. I know he cares. Did you say regularly checked on? Fuck. Come on, man. I don't even wait for things to die. At this rate, I'll get there. It's fine. Look, I die, I beep. He changes me out for new ones. Not like he doesn't know I exist. Changes you out for new ones? Really? You had to- All right, let's all just calm down. Yeah, easy for you to say. Look at me, I'm a fork. I get washed all the time. I prefer the dishwasher, okay? I don't like when he touches me. Ugh, you and me both, honey.