Comedy sketch

Holy shit, man. Welcome to the party, Phil! Oh, we're fucked. Advil? Holy shit. What the hell is going on? Talk around the tummy is, he went on a wicked bender last night. Good God. Where are the reinforcements? Well, Red Gatorade stopped by about an hour ago, but we all know how useless he is. Okay, what about vegetables? We have one. This is olive. We're pretty sure he was a garnish on a martini, but he ain't holding up so well. I don't even want to ask, but how is liver doing? Why don't you see for yourself? We are going to need a miracle to survive. Splash, splash, fizz, fizz. It's mimosa, bitch. Mimosa? Oh, no. Sir, you're going to want to see this. Holy fucking shitballs. It's brunch.