The midwest language is tricky 😅

Today I'm going to teach you how to speak Midwestern. First thing you need to learn is the ABCs, which in the Midwest is the yeah, no, yes. If we want to tell you no, we'll say yeah, no. And if we want to tell you yes, we'll say no, yeah. And if we want to tell you maybe, we'll say yeah, no, yeah. And I've tried to figure it out, but I can't make sense of it. So don't question it. Just accept it, you know? We'll also need to learn how to do small talk in the Midwest, which is very simple. All you got to do is point out obvious stuff. The more obvious, the better. If you're at the bar with your buddy, you'll say something like, wow, bar's busy tonight. He can see that. He knows that it's busy. But that's just how we talk. Or if you see an animal, just shout out its species. Deer! Cow! Turkey! And when it comes to weather, you just say stuff like, hey, it's snowing out. But where the real magic happens is when they say, yeah, those are some big flakes. Next thing you know, you're best friends. Now I got to tell you how to ask for a favor paired with a way for them to get out of it. Let me just show you. Hey man, would you mind helping me move on Saturday? If you don't have time, that's fine. Like I don't want to inconvenience you. Or feel free to say no, but will you marry me? If not, that's totally fine. We are so afraid of inconveniencing people that we always give them an out. We'd rather suffer alone than make someone do something they don't want to do. You're also going to need to learn about emotions, which is impossible for someone in the Midwest. And basically there's just one rule. Bury your emotions deep down and never bring them up. Instead, people from the Midwest use actions instead of emotions because actions speak louder than words. Instead of saying, I love you, we'll just change your oil for you. Instead of saying, sorry, we'll just give you a couple packages of venison brats. And instead of saying, I understand how you're feeling, we're just going to go get you another beer. So really, if you want to speak Midwest, don't say anything. Next you need to learn the local state vernacular. In Wisconsin, it's not a water fountain. It's a bubbler. In Minnesota, instead of saying doing donuts, they say whipping shitties, which arguably is cooler than saying donuts, but still a little strange. And a really big one are these guys right here. In most Midwest states, we call them pull tabs. But for some reason in Nebraska, they call them pickle cards. There are a rare few that call them a waste of money, but I call those people quitters. And you can't forget about the word ope. It is a Midwest classic. You're going to hear it a whole lot. And it is the Swiss army knife of Midwest words. You can reach Jedi master level. If you pair it with the coveted sneak right past you, it will blow people's minds. So no, yeah, that's about it. And if you're not too busy, we'd love if you could comment anything that we missed. But if not, if it's too much inconvenience, you don't have to. Customer hired another company, but they called me back. This is what happened. Earlier today, I completed this job, pressure washing concrete for a customer. This customer has hired me several times over the last few years to complete multiple jobs for them. When it became time to pressure wash their property, they asked for a quote. After receiving my quote, the customer asked me if that was my best price. I told the customer that I couldn't go.